We put real thought into the clothes the world sees, and very little into the ones it doesn't. Yet what you wear closest to your skin changes how you carry yourself, all day and in your most private moments. The good news: the principles that make a coat look made for you work just as well here.

Fit comes first

Nothing undermines confidence like something that digs in, rides up or gapes. Fit is what makes underwear disappear under clothes and look its best on its own.

  • Get measured. A professional bra fitting transforms how everything sits, and many people are wearing the wrong size. Be measured again every year or after any change in your body.
  • Buy for the body you have today, not the one you plan to have. Comfortable and well fitted always looks better than small and tight.
  • Men, too: underwear with a supportive, smooth fit and a waistband that stays flat looks sharper under tailoring and on its own. Replace anything that has lost its shape.

Fabrics that feel as good as they look

Touch matters as much as appearance. A few fabrics are worth knowing:

  • Silk: light, smooth and quietly luxurious. A silk robe or slip is one of the simplest ways to feel special at home.
  • Fine cotton and modal: soft, breathable and right for every day.
  • Lace and mesh: beautiful when well made; look for soft edges and smooth seams so it feels as good as it looks.
  • Cashmere and fine knits for loungewear: the most comfortable way to look put-together on a quiet evening.

Wear your colours

The shades that flatter your face flatter your skin everywhere. If your colour season is warm, try champagne, cocoa, rust and warm black. Cooler colourings shine in ivory, navy, plum and true black. Nude works best when it's close to your own skin tone rather than a generic beige.

Dress for yourself

The most attractive thing anyone can wear is the sense that they feel good. Choose what makes you feel confident, whether that's simple and minimal, soft and romantic, or something a little bolder. Comfort is never the opposite of appeal; ease is what people notice.

  • Keep one "feel-good" set or outfit ready for the evenings you want to feel your best.
  • Upgrade the in-between: a beautiful robe, good pyjamas or a fine T-shirt and joggers make the hours at home feel considered.
  • Finish with scent: a little of your signature fragrance on the skin, worn lightly.

Caring for it

Delicate pieces last far longer washed by hand or on a gentle cycle in a mesh bag, and dried flat, away from heat. Fasten hooks before washing so they don't snag, and store bras with cups nested rather than folded.

At ease in your bodyIf what you wear is less the issue than how you feel about your body, start with our guide to feeling at ease in your body and confidence, close up.

This article is general style guidance. More in Intimacy & Relationships.